


Helpless

by Iridescent_Ren



Category: Natsume Yuujinchou | Natsume's Book of Friends
Genre: Angst, Kinda, tw hospitals
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-16
Updated: 2017-09-16
Packaged: 2018-12-30 10:43:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12106989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iridescent_Ren/pseuds/Iridescent_Ren
Summary: Tanuma's left to the cold sterile walls of the hospital, fear clinging to his every bit of sanity as Natsume is rushed away. //half vent fic





	Helpless

**Author's Note:**

> When the first thing you write for a fandom is a really bad vent fic :')))))) The first part with just Tanuma i wrote as a vent while mum was in hospital, i wrote the rest later since it needed an ending. This is really bad though ahsjedhjfgj hopefully i can write a better one for this fandom.

“Natsume… Natsume please…!” White pristine hospital walls seemed to endlessly close in on him, faceless workers busting around shouting words he didn’t understand. The wheels on the bed that they ran along the hallway freaked, the boy on top almost looked like a ghost.

Natsumes skin was pale and white, his hair soft but messy as usual. His eyes blinked but he avoided meeting the others worried eyes, they looked to be staring at something, staring at a blank space on a wall in almost defeat. 

Tanuma didn’t do anything. Why couldn’t he do anything?

Beep beep beep the machine shouted angrily, the moment of silence not lasting long as he was pushed into a room with a curtain drawn on him. Tanuma was left, isolated in the cold sterile hallway looking hopeless and lost alone with his thoughts. 

Was there something he could have done? Could he have prevented how Natsumes hands started to shake until his knees collapsed under him when his body started to violently thrash against his will? He didn’t even know what had happened to him, he didn’t know if it was an Ayakashi or just a medical problem, but Tanuma had enough common sense to know Natsume was in serious trouble. 

He clenched his fist tightly, unknowing that it had started to go white. Natsume was strong, he dealt with so much with a smile on his face. Natsume would have known what to do… so why still couldn’t he be a person Natsume could rely on? He wanted to be someone that could help Natsume, someone strong enough to stay by his side. But could he really say that when he stood helplessly in shock until Nyanko sensei had gotten Taki to call an ambulance. 

The damn cat was a better help than he was. Tanuma was afraid, he was afraid something would happen to Natsume, afraid he wouldn’t be able to see Natsume again. Selfish. He couldn’t imagine how much fear was circling in Natsumes head and yet- 

“He’s awake, you can see him now” said a nurse with a kind smile. Tanuma thanked her before pushing aside the curtains and hurrying to Natsumes side. He looked peaceful, Natsume sleepily rubbed his eyes and gave a smile. 

“Sorry, Tanuma-“ Natsume said softly. “I didn’t want to scare you…” He said with an apologetic chuckle, “It was Ayakashi, you were wondering right? I’m fine though” 

“… why on earth are you apologizing, I couldn’t help you at all when you needed it most” Tanuma said with a heavy sigh and dark clouds circling his eyes. Natsume was kind he’d surely try to convince him otherwise but Tanuma messed up, he was willing to admit it because that’s all he was capable of doing. He couldn’t even fix the mess he made. 

“Tanuma, don’t say that.” Natsume turned serious, frowning at him. “We talked about this, you already do more than enough for me. If you really want to save me that bad there’s always a next time” He added jokingly, his frown loosening. 

“There won’t be a next time…” Tanuma was lying to himself, of course there would be a next time. There would always be a next time. Natsume was always, always burdened by it, that wasn’t going to stop despite how much he wished it so. 

“Mm, I guess you’re right” Natsume replied, looking out the hospital window with eyes of glass. They both knew there would always be a next time. 

“Apparently I can’t be let out for a day or two, it may be a bit to ask but… would you visit me?” Natsume asked, a light awkward smile on his face that Tanuma could tell wasn’t faked. 

“You two are so loud, go somewhere else” Mandara complained, rising his head from his spot at the end of the bed. Tanuma was so focused on Natsume he didn’t even realize Ponta was lying there.

“Shut up Sensei, I’ll make sure you don’t get any of Toukos cooking” Natsume bit back, earning an alarmed and upset Ponta. 

“Sorry Pont- Nyanko sensei, we’ll be quieter” Tanuma said with a chuckle. They seem to be getting along well. 

“This man knows how to respect those better than him” Mandara proudly said, lying back down in his spot. Tanuma couldn’t help but notice how careful he was to lie down, not once moving the bed or stepping on Natsumes thin figure in case it hurt.

Despite him being the pain he usually was even Tanuma could see he was worried, maybe even a bit guilty. So even Youkai could become attached to humans, wether or not they’d admit it. 

“Of course ill visit, I’ll bring you and Nyanko sensei snacks too” Mandara sparkled at the idea while Natsume happily nodded. 

“Thanks Tanuma!” 

“I’ll be going home with him now” “Aren’t you supposed to be my body guard?!”

As Mandara and Natsume quabbled amongst themselves Tanuma quietly took his leave, the cold walls not seeming as hostile as they once were, the doctors rushing around started to form a face that Tanuma could recognize as kind. 

He still didn’t like hospitals, but maybe if Natsume was alright they wouldn’t be so bad.


End file.
